The ending of a romantic relationship between two people doesn’t end their relationship as parents. Many questions are raised about what will happen to a child after a divorce or the separation of the parents: Who will the child stay with? For how long? How will they be disciplined? Who will pay for things they need? It is vital to create a co-parenting plan that not only answers these questions but to ensure stability in the child’s life.
What is a Co-Parenting Plan?
A co-parenting plan is a written agreement between the parents of a child which details how the child will be raised. Co-parenting plans can have varied levels of detail, apply focus to areas of concern, and provide clarity and predictability to custody issues. They are as unique as your relationship with your child.
What Should Be Included In Your Plan?
There are a large number of topics that most parents don’t discuss until a situation arises which can lead to lots of arguing and even court hearings. While a co-parenting plan won’t be able to guide a parent through every single aspect of parenting their child, it should include a structure to address and resolve future issues.
Below is a list of information of some items you should include in your plan:
- Parenting Schedule (Custody Schedule)
- Holiday and Special Dates Schedule/Plans (holidays, birthdays, anniversaries, etc.)
- Traveling and Vacation (notice, payment, method of travel, distance, etc.)
- Attendance of Child’s Extracurricular Activities
- Schedule for Child’s Appointments
- Schedule Changes
- Important Decisions
- Religion
- Education
- Medical
- Emergency
- Electronics
- Rules about child being introduced to or cared for by other people
- Extended Family
- New Romantic Partners
- Discipline and Rules for Child
- Communication with Kids
- Frequency
- Method
- Emergency
- Co-Parent Communication
- Frequency
- Method
- Subjects
- Emergency
As previously mentioned, these are only some of the items that you should consider and include in your plan. If you think of more things that you feel are needed, you should advocate for their inclusion.
Where to Start?
There are a few ways to get started in the creation of your co-parent plan. If you and your partner are still cooperative and civil, you may want to start with a conversation. Mediation is a great way to have a progressive conversation where you and your co-parent can agree on the information to include for your plan. Each parent should have his or her own attorney review any written plans and advise as to the consequences or impact of their plan.
If you or someone you know has questions about creating a parenting plan, contact lawyers who can guide you. Book a consultation with Kathryn Dickerson (kndickerson@smolenplevy.com) or Alan Plevy (abplevy@smolenplevy.com) to get started.
About the Authors
Alan Plevy
Alan Plevy is a recognized force in family law, mediation and litigation, with more than 40 years as one of the most experienced divorce lawyers in Virginia. Mr. Plevy is known for being a tenacious litigator and negotiator who is zealously devoted to his clients. A top legal publication, Virginia Lawyer Weekly, noted Mr. Plevy’s impact on the law when it named two cases he litigated among its Top Five Landmark Family Law Cases in Virginia. Those two cases, which date back to the 1980s, are still regularly cited by attorneys and courts.
Kyung (Kathryn) Dickerson
Kyung (Kathryn) Dickerson is a principal at SmolenPlevy in Vienna, Virginia. She is a graduate of the University of Virginia and George Mason University School of Law, where she served on the Board of Editors for the Journal of International Legal Studies. Ms. Dickerson is also presently General Counsel for the Asian Pacific American Bar Association of Virginia and has served as President of the organization and on its Board of Directors. She has also served on the Board of Directors of the Virginia Women Attorneys Association and served as its President. She has served on numerous committees of the Fairfax Bar Association and as President of its Young Lawyers Section and as Co-Chair of the Revenue Development Committee.
