Alan Plevy, a founding principal of SmolenPlevy, says there are plenty of reasons couples call it quits after decades of marriage.
- Empty Nest Syndrome: It’s common for many couples to stay together for the sake of their children. The topic of divorce often comes up once the kids graduate high school or college. Additionally, some couples don’t want to worry about child custody and wait to get a divorce once the children have turned 18.
- Major Life Changes: A rapid change of pace of life for a couple, such as being transferred to a different job location or a severe illness, can quickly change the dynamic of a marriage and push spouses to divorce. Significant life changes are more the norm than the exception in long-term marriages — and can add stress to any union including a pandemic.
- Less Stigma: Societal norms considered “scandalous” 30 years ago (i.e., getting a divorce) are now widely accepted. The “stick it out” mentality is dissolving, and divorce is less stigmatized. We often see celebrities marry, divorce and remarry within mere months, which helps break down the outdated stereotypes about divorcees.
Plevy says Gray Divorces also offer their own set of challenges compared to traditional divorces.
- More Assets: With more time to build up their wealth, the value of marital assets is often more significant for older couples. Younger couples seeking a divorce may face challenges like who gets to keep the debt, while older couples must work to divide vacation homes or hefty retirement funds. Divorcing couples must report and adequately evaluate all assets and seek legal guidance to ensure a fair division of property.
- Retirement: Many couples going through a Gray Divorce are on the edge of or already in retirement. Getting a divorce later in life can lead to financial instability for some spouses. Seeking advice from a divorce attorney can help prepare and secure the financial assets of both separating spouses.
- Financial Obligations: Getting a divorce later on in life can cause conflicts about financial obligations to adult children such as weddings, graduate school, or other large financial-support promises. Additionally, spouses may wish to ensure that their children and grandchildren are the heirs of their estate rather than a potential new spouse.
Plevy says good estate planning and legal counsel during a Gray Divorce is essential to reduce financial risk and smoothly enter the next chapter of life.
Have questions or need legal guidance about a pending Gray Divorce? Contact Alan Plevy at ABPlevy@smolenplevy.com.
About the Author
Alan Plevy
Alan Plevy is a recognized force in family law, mediation and litigation, with more than 40 years as one of the most experienced divorce lawyers in Virginia. Mr. Plevy is known for being a tenacious litigator and negotiator who is zealously devoted to his clients. A top legal publication, Virginia Lawyer Weekly, noted Mr. Plevy’s impact on the law when it named two cases he litigated among its Top Five Landmark Family Law Cases in Virginia. Those two cases, which date back to the 1980s, are still regularly cited by attorneys and courts.
